Knowing You are the Father: A Right You Share With Your Children
1. Fathers have the right to be assured of their parentage when their children are born, without respect to their legal relationship with the mother of their children.
Maternity is pretty easy to figure out. Always has been. While developments in reproductive technology have blurred the distinction to the public, even a host womb knows whose kid she carries. But paternity isn’t so easy. The law in most states presumes (there’s that pesky word again!) that a child born during a marriage is the child of the marriage. But we all know that isn’t always true. Consider the following hypotheticals:
* A married couple divorces and during the divorce, mom files for a paternity test, claiming dad isn’t really dad. Is it a ploy to keep dad out of the kid’s life or is it the truth?
* A teen girl tells her boyfriend she’s pregnant and he’s the daddy. His parents hit the roof and tell him to do the right thing. Go down there and sign that affidavit acknowledging himself to be the baby’s father. Ten years, no college and thousands of dollars of child support later, he learns from a family friend that he might not be the father after all.
* After years of marriage, a couple splits and during the divorce, the father learns that one of “his” kids isn’t really his. Mom refuses to participate in DNA testing or identify the biological father and the court decides he has to support the child until he is 18.
* Romeo and Juliet engage in a torrid extramarital affair. They are married, but not to each other. Romeo finds out Juliet is pregnant. She tells him it’s his child. He leaves his wife, loses his home, loses his kids, only to have Juliet tell him she’s not so sure anymore and she wants to make her marriage work. The courts refuse to allow a DNA test because Romeo is not Juliet’s husband and he wasn’t when the child was conceived.
Recognition of paternity fraud is on the rise. Across the nation, people are talking about the problem: Armin Brott, Parenting Coach, on Paternity Fraud. And the solution — DNA testing of all children at birth, upon request — is coming from unlikely sources. Geraldine Jensen, of the Association for Children for Enforcement of Support, recommended it several years ago: Paternity Fraud a Growing Issue.
And how about the kids? What difference does it make to them? We might all wish that a father who learns he isn’t a father would love the kid enough to say, “You know what, I raised this kid and I cared for him, and, while I don’t think I should be obligated to financially support him, he’s still “my” kid.” A lot of them do. But there are others who can’t jump the hurdle of looking at the child and knowing they were lied to, cheated on, or otherwise treated unfairly. How fair is it to the child to run the risk of losing a father’s love and respect because Mom lied? It’s a lot more complicated to try to deal with the problem when the child is older. Then, there are other important issues that kids need and have the right to know about, such as genetic issues, health problems, a whole host of information that is a lot harder to track down and deal with when the child is older.
States could make DNA testing mandatory at birth for every child, born in — or out — of wedlock. DNA testing is a non-invasive, simple test that could be performed at birth. Parental obligation to support a child turns on parentage. The state has an interest in ensuring accurate parental identification. If a husband is not the father of a child, not only are his rights and the child’s rights protected, identifying the biological father is far easier than trying to find out who it was five, ten or more years in the future.
















